Cold Nostalgia

Monday, April 18, 2011 @ 4/18/2011 08:10:00 PM

heavy-heartedness

wow its been AGES

and i MEAN ages

which i think is good?

but i suddenly feel like im a reflecting mood

im not really sure what triggered it but well

i dunno i think coz my life is about to ......have some minor changes again

i kinda hate myself for being such a......i dunno...slow and rigid person?

i take time to oil my gears when they have to be reset?

i take time to re-adjust?

i take time to basically do anything....

WHY is my brain so retarded

i think im upset with myself today coz i was expecting more out of myself?

i was expecting to hit stats today with the new coverage

but in the end i still couldnt manage..i think my menstrual cramps got the better of me

but still!!!! sigh....

and now with the rotation

ok i am REALLY very thankful tt im not being rotated to THAT team

so im safe for now

but.....its not for long i'll tell you that

its only a matter of time

esp the longer i stay

but then again...this is the reason i joined an acute setting right?

to try all areas and gain exposure

so no going back on tt plan ness

gotta stick to it and move forward

think of the BIG picture.

lets see after......6 more months..

but in any case..

hwaiting to me

ok i still have time to prepare myself

i need to....psych myself?

ARGH!!!!!!!!!!

SO many things on my mind

not tt they are all bothering me particularly now though

but ill tell you this...they are bugging me in the bg though...

its like poison

worrying is poison...slow-acting poison

and guess what? im full of it.

which means what? ill die in due time.

LOVELY.

*goes mad*

OK NESS

HWAITING~

gonna enjoy my current team while i can

learn all i can for now

I..........will try not to think so much :)

affiliates Amelia Valerie Fiona Ying Hui Maylyn Alethea Yimei Kin Sing Sarah Shu Zhen ACAREAK
Tuesday, April 19, 2011 @ 4/19/2011 10:49:00 PM I HATE MY BORING LIFE DAMMIT i would rather live in a drama now at least its more interesting there AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH cries delusions..can be so comforting... back to top?
Monday, April 18, 2011 @ 4/18/2011 08:10:00 PM heavy-heartedness wow its been AGES and i MEAN ages which i think is good? but i suddenly feel like im a reflecting mood im not really sure what triggered it but well i dunno i think coz my life is about to ......have some minor changes again i kinda hate myself for being such a......i dunno...slow and rigid person? i take time to oil my gears when they have to be reset? i take time to re-adjust? i take time to basically do anything.... WHY is my brain so retarded i think im upset with myself today coz i was expecting more out of myself? i was expecting to hit stats today with the new coverage but in the end i still couldnt manage..i think my menstrual cramps got the better of me but still!!!! sigh.... and now with the rotation ok i am REALLY very thankful tt im not being rotated to THAT team so im safe for now but.....its not for long i'll tell you that its only a matter of time esp the longer i stay but then again...this is the reason i joined an acute setting right? to try all areas and gain exposure so no going back on tt plan ness gotta stick to it and move forward think of the BIG picture. lets see after......6 more months.. but in any case.. hwaiting to me ok i still have time to prepare myself i need to....psych myself? ARGH!!!!!!!!!! SO many things on my mind not tt they are all bothering me particularly now though but ill tell you this...they are bugging me in the bg though... its like poison worrying is poison...slow-acting poison and guess what? im full of it. which means what? ill die in due time. LOVELY. goes mad OK NESS HWAITING~ gonna enjoy my current team while i can learn all i can for now I..........will try not to think so much :) back to top?