cause cold
nostalgia
chills me to the bones
tag please or die

ness says hi

If you're here you probably know/knew me
Whatever the case, help yourself to my blahblahs, however interesting they may be.


bolditalicunderlinestrikeout
affiliates

Amelia Valerie Fiona Ying Hui Maylyn Alethea Yimei Kin Sing Sarah Shu Zhen ACAREAK
Friday, June 27, 2008 @ 6/27/2008 03:32:00 PM
bleah
im in school again

yes

on a day tt im not supposed to have school

i am ONCE AGAIN

IN SCHOOL

lovely.

anyway...its not like its for crap

its for work..so WOOHOO!

we need it anyway...too many things to settle..

and viva is coming up soon and no ones really prepared.

everyones been busy with all the other reports.

OH WELL

on to other things.

acasola's dirty little secret. theres VP. it sounds different this round. the bg. DAMN. i still like her voice.
acasola's acasolove...THATS ONE COOL SONG. i din realise it was the coca-sola song RIGHT FROM THE BEGINNING. i thot it was just infused in...but NO! ahah...nice...

im supposed to be doing my report but ive gotta leave school in a bit to get home to get ready to leave home again for pract. AHAHH! so.....yea...i read my blog and i realised i shld update coz im not gg with tt flow now..heh..

anyway...im excited to get my very-own Aca-tee. YAY! im gonna make sure its green!!!! =)))))) my 2 fave things combined in one...lovely...finally group tee lah! and EVERYONE gets one...YAY! ahah..

ok...i shld end off now...try to squeeze some work in then start packing up..or maybe i shld do some work on the train? ahahahah!!! who am i kidding?
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Tuesday, June 24, 2008 @ 6/24/2008 11:35:00 PM
blar dee dar

its tues

wow

time is passing..........i dun even know if its fast or not..

i dunno if im happy abt tt or not

but wadeva it is

another day tt passes means another day to fret about

AHAHAH!!

SO i guess tts a WOOHOO!!

why do i sound so depressed.

dun worry ppl..its nothing..its just school.

ANYWAY!!!

i cant wait for thurs and fri!!!!!

FINALLY a break from monotony

whether or not i can afford the time is another issue altogether

but HEY!!! i need balance in my life man.

SO EXCITING!!!!
MWHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHH!!!

anyway
how has school been so far?
ok lah
seems like the hols were no diff from now
just tt i hate tues
coz there's sensory dysfx
and tt lesson always kills my brain
i just wanna pass my viva ok? please?

HIAZZZZZ

today i was thinking again
wad happens aft i graduate
and i mean FINALLY graduate

i was talking to kin tt day abt our future business venture
we'd have our VERY OWN "PRIVATE PRACTICE"
and we'd offer OT (duh..not much of a choice there) and we'd get music and drama therapists as well
and OT sessions will try to incorporate music and drama where appropriate as well

COOL HUH?!

then comes the issue of getting tt diploma in music therapy which is an additional yr and at umelb ( i think)

HOW?!

haiyah..its all a sketchy idea and dream....

its a plan nontheless.

feasibility is another matter altogether.

just like SOLITAIRE.

HAHAHA!

but really...i dunno wad i wanna do when i grad.
i need to do my mental health placement b4 i commit myself to an interest area
at present i dun mind hands i guess
but if i really wanna go into it
ill have to read a hell lot.

WOOHOO

OK im off!
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Sunday, June 22, 2008 @ 6/22/2008 08:47:00 PM
WOOHOO...holz -_-
WELL

2mr i start school again

i lost track of time

i guess its coz the hols never really was the hols

i was in school at least 80% of the time

WHAT KIND OF A HOLS WAS THAT?!

well..yea sure i had time to go k-box and do SOME fun stuff but i din really get the chance to just NUA...NUAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

and was makes it worse is tt all that effort in the hols seems like it was somewhat wasted doing that blasted project...i mean...wendy is like tremendously helpful. one moment she recommends we do this and not that, then she says we do that and not this...and now she says why didnt we include this into that as well.......we ( or kin and i at least) were THIS close to tearing our hair out......just made all the time spent in school come to nothing...well..not really nothing but...yea..you get the idea...HORRIBLE......all i can say is " MAKE UP YOUR MIIIIIIIIIiiiIIIInnnNNNDD..." and no more of tt song is to be associated with her or the project....not worth tainting it...... but wad can i say man? that song ROCKS..

and now on my last few hrs of the hols im still doing work......SO BLASTED-LY irritating!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

anyway...on to happier things...or not...i dunno...im currently hooked on to ooh oohm mah aye,oohm mah aye leh * repeat* GREY STREET by Vox 11. and i know i said i wld leave the topic of my hols being destryoed but this just reminded me of sth.....

that i DIDN'T get the chance to arrange anything like i planned to during this 2 week break.

NADA.

TZAHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

im VERY SAD NOW

WHERE DID MY ME TIME GO?

if it wasnt fitting school in, it was fitting everything else in.
not tt i dun like the everything else. it rocks waay more compared to school.

where is FYP going?! i know its too soon to feel defeated but seriously....i dunno....with ppl who cant make up their mind in the direction they want to steer us in...i mean i know they're just supposed to guide us and not DO the project with us but seriously...this topic is NOT as straightforward as it seems( doubt you realised till we raised all our doubts -__-)...we're already operating on diff wavelengths and constantly changing your 'demands" is NOT helping...this information is for YOU guys....for YOU and your FUTURE program....unless i become a participant of the program ( which i doubt i will be) this information is REALLY of LITTLE significance to me realisitically..

of course if i have to go into my reflective mode of how-the-world-is-so-wonderful-and-how-as-OTs-we-shld-always-see-the-good-and-flowers-and-butterflies and reflect all the time then YEA i can see how it is beneficial to me ( i recognise the significance in the long run dun get me wrong) but i beleive im a being with insight ( sometimes WAAAAY too much for my own good) so yea...DUDE...to put it crudely, we're doing your sai kang and even if tts the case you gotta AT LEAST show us wad direction you want tt SAI to be KANG-ed in ya know?

ok...maybe coz im frustrated now with my lack of a holiday-rested-feeling tts why im blaming everything on anything else but im not taking back wad i just typed anyway...i mean it...at least in this state of mind im being as rational as i possibly can without betraying myself so AMEN. sp like i said : its a blog. subjective. if you cant handle, grow up. reflect. isnt that wad you told me? betch.


OK! AWAY AWAY FROM SCHOOL.

lets see wad happened this week...well...we kboxed which was bloody fun..we HAVE to go again in dec i tell you..AHAH!! and we had pract! WOOHOO!! CALL ME WHEN YOU'RE SOBERRRR!! and dan and i vid-convoed with jon b4 pract tt day..hahaha...long time since we last vid convo-ed.. daAAAAAaaammmMMnnnn FUN....really makes you miss the group dynamics...hiaz....part of me wants time to pass by faster but the other wishes i had more time to do stuff...such is life, the constant struggle for balance...

and dan and i were just discussing abt our 21st....ahaha....getting old sia...will prob have 2-3 rounds of celebration on both our sides..with diff grps of ppl so yea...it'll be busy during tt period anyway..horrid time so my bdae will be sth to look forward to during tt period...i dun usually bother with my bdae much but it being 21st and it during the clinical period just gives you a chance to take a break from the monotonous stress of it all..yes, monotonous stress..the stress keeps coming tt aft a while you dun wanna react to it anymore...

i still feel somewhat down but i dunno why...

ok happy thoughts ness!! happy thoughts!! the coming week will be a BLAST! IT WILL!!

* oh great..i just rmbed i have management report to rush next week..ARGH! thank goodness its just 500 words*
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Friday, June 20, 2008 @ 6/20/2008 12:43:00 AM
i hope i dun kill it
i hope i dun kill it

im already gg sharp aft analysing against the goddess of call me when you're sober
(other than amy lee)

i dun usually fret abt songs this early esp since we only learnt it today

but this is THE song

MY FAVOURITE SONG

KATH GOOD's SONG

(sorry baraka)

AHAHAH!

i GOTTA get it right

now THIS is the kind of stress i enjoy......

i had to type this out somewhere to affirm it for myself... somewhere..AHAHA

thanks for analysing kin! =)
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Monday, June 16, 2008 @ 6/16/2008 06:56:00 PM
ness and dan's dye ep 1
Ness met dan aft her VERY FILLING dim sum lunch with her classmates and off they went to buy hair dye for dan from GWC where they went thru the very interesting and rigorous task of choosing a right hair colour..

1) dan shoved his head against every piece of fake hair

2) they realised it wasnt not going anywhere

3) they decided to take a pic of daniel

4) they then shoved the phone against every piece of fake hair available to see how the colour looked like against his skin tone

so aft tt was done....dan couldnt wait to dye his hair ...so they set off to ness's place to embark on a wonderfully messy journey..



Vanessa and Daniel's Trip to to the Kwek's Salon.

#13-01

Please call to make an appointment as spaces are VERY limited.

Dyeing your hair will cost $12.90. YES. its THAT cheap.

we provide "HIGH" quality dyes:


we have "HIGHLY" sophisticated equipment.


and yes..we go thru the WHOLE routine.

you must be wondering how.

we'll let you discover for yourself.

Our experts make it a point to put our products through a series of rigorous tests. Here at Kwek's Salon, we take tt teeeny-tiny bit of effort to make sure that you know wad you're getting yourself into.
The pitures below will show you the behind the scenes preperation for testing:

1) Mix Colorsilk Permanent Hair Colour and Cream Colour developer in a plastic or glass container. ( in this case a bottlecap)

2) Snip a small swatch of hair of about 1.4 inch wide and tape one end. ( well..erm....dan was waaay smart to snip a sprinkling of hair.... HAHA!)



3) We make effort to ensure we do things the right way...hence, we often refer to our protocol to guide our practice.


- im gonna lay off the advertising gimmicky lang here...to tiringto continue in my current state of mind-
4) We then decide we wanna try and see whether it works with white hair or not. SO....yours truly supplies..


5) We let the mixture work its magic for 25mins and then VOILA! its time to see the result. BUT..BECAUSE we had SPRINKLINGS of hair,we had to find a way to rinse the gunk off...so......



LOVELY AIN'T IT?


Reminds you of sth? AHAH!

6)so we mix and swirl and swirl and swirl and drain and VOILA!..........you;re not supposed to see any colour difference in case you;re wondering AHAH! and if you're wondering how the white hairs turned out...they were just stained SLIGHTLY yellow aft 15min or so -__-. ( makes me think twice indeed..stubborn white hairs)


7) so just to show you how its SUPPOSED to look like:

8) now we PROCEED. Presenting the dye-ee and the dye-er. AHAH! Dan's all geared up in an old tee of mine and a carrefour plastic bag...ahaha! my hair sucks here coz i wasnt ready for a pic but yea..ahaha

9) so we sh-sh-shake it, sh-sh-shake it up. and with an object in hand...its hard to resist doing THAT signature pose. ( i know dan's face is a lil dark but yea.....you can make out wad hes trying to do lah)



10) we've got the instructions, the scissors to cut the bottle open, the sink in case of emergency and of course..the radio...too bad you guys werent here to listen to it....the only channel tt was clear was one of those 93.3 channels and it REALLY felt like we were in a salon.


11) AND ITS FINALLY TIME TO KILL DAN'S HAIR......with dan seated on the toilet bowl and me hovering ard him to squeeze dye on his hair and marinate it in...its like playing masak masak somehow..AHHAHA! and look how happy he and his hair both are...HAHAHAH!!


12) so after i was done gg thru his hair once...he went thru it a second round before we set it to rest for 25mins.( machiam like baking cake) yea..it was like shampoo-ing his hair..AHAH! but surprisingly the peroxide didnt sting his scalp...



13) then it was my turn...he convinced me to just try on a portion of my fringe...like rogue -_-


14) and here we are.....dyed...AHAHAHAH!! ( im sorry tt i had to load this pic dan but it was the best one...ahaha)

15) so aft tt was done...we evaluated and we decided dan needed some touch-ups...and we had extra...and well...we decided to do more damage to my hair..AHAHAH!!! and well..dan got tired of doing it the right way...so my hair was treated like......how you wld prepare sambal stingray for bbq...but worse...AHAH!





he said i look like one of those ppl who talk to aliens...MWAHAHAHH!! thanks to...?

and if you wanna know how it turned out in the end...well...dan looks like he did sth to his hair if you look at it from the side and only the one done on my fringe is visible IF you stare hard enough under the sun.....

round 2 of dyeing in 4 weeks? full head next round? lemme think about it.....HAHAHA!
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Sunday, June 15, 2008 @ 6/15/2008 05:01:00 PM
thinking again
went to watch budak pantai yesterday

free of course.

at the concourse at esplanade

so i got my fix of live acappella music making this week.

i literally FEED of singing i realised

and im very auditorily stimulated.

wihtout music i feel sleepy.

bored.

cant concentrate.

no amount of shaking and jumping and pinching works.

AHAHAHAH!

but in anycase...it was nice to see tt some of my classmates are into acappella....
well..maybe they were before but i just was unaware of it
either tt or my obsession and acareak has made them more aware of wad acapooku is

and well..budak pantai is where most ppl start.
i know tts where i did.
i mean..AFTER boybands. AHAH!
they do light hearted,humourous tunes.
they have their own TRULY distinct style.
they make it local but not cheesy local. ( thats hard as we all know)
yea..they play the guitar and sing but its still mainly acappella.
when you start to analyse their songs and the harmonies.
then you realise..there could be MORE to acappella.

and...well...ive kinda moved on from budak pantai.
not tt i dun like them anymore
i still like them and in fact i think they're a really creative and talented bunch of ppl
but when you've discovered collegiate acappella groups.
YEA BABY.
theres just TONS more waiting to be explored.

sam and i are on the same level of acappella-fanaticism in school
but no one has QUITE reached acareak's level of analysis and fanaticism of acappella songs.

i love you guys.


PS: i love their 'why do men need nipples' song they sang last night. AHAHH! i recorded!!
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Thursday, June 12, 2008 @ 6/12/2008 11:31:00 PM
outing
had dinner tonight with fio and val..

it started off pretty interesting


we were late( duh)


val was uncontactable (phone died)


fio and i were trying to psychoanalyse val


"what wld i do if i were val and im uncontactable and i KNOW we're meeting here? hmmm"


we eventually found each other...


we ditched the waraku pasta place idea since we were starving and head to manhattan fish market place


we were hungry and bored waiting for dinner


i brought my casio exlim


we decided to play ard with it..


and since its been eons since i last had a photo post...


HERE IT IS!!

fio and val ( tts my pink thing she's wearing.....ahaha...


val and i



and now the experimenting begins (some modes dun look any diff from normal...yea..we learnt tt today too..ahaha)



and now my FAVOURITE ones of the night

the spastic ones DUH


this one...to commemorate the occasion and to show how hungry we were
and yes...we were trying to look like fish..AHAHA!


its actually white bg....so yea..

dinner finally came:


and for some weird reason i was super drawn to the lights...like some...magpie...so yea..

these 2 ppl arent impt in the photo..ahaha!



so we walk home from clarke quay. one of those rare occasions val says yes and doesnt complain. much. AHAHH!

so tts the end

2mr...ill finally get to stay at home. sure ill have work to do. but its ok.

i cant wait for tuesday man!!! so exciting! i wonder if they have CALL ME WHEN YOU'RE SOBERRRRRRRRRR....AHAHH! tt'll be so cool!!! sth tells me they prob wun tho..ahaha

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Sunday, June 08, 2008 @ 6/08/2008 04:02:00 PM
onto happier things
ok..

on to happier, less emotionally charged posts

YAY!!!

im having the most relaxing weekend so far

i havent done anything school-related since fri night

ive been acapooku surfing( havent done tt in a long time), blogging, blog surfing, facebook surfing

feels wrong but it feels nice.

HAHA!!

ive finally finished grey's season 3 which i got from dunno who like eons ago....so anticlimatic can?? for a moment i thought i was missing some episodes...so here i am watching season 4 online now...woohoo...

well..meeting 2mr for FYP ....and the day after...and the day after...AHAHH!! hiaz....2mr's at st bern's...so woohoo for me....

and i know this was supposed to be a happier post but somehow now im feeling this wave of some sort of sadness....i dunno...just feels empty...like theres a part of me missing sth...sounds dramatic but i dunno how else to describe it...how to fill the void? i dunno...it comes and goes...and yea...everytime it coems i never find a solution...its just temporary relief...well...i hate how my mind plays with me...sheesh...im gonna go listen to some awaken ain't nobody....grey's is messing me up with its characters and their messed up lives...ahahahah



acapooku ALWAYS works
i feel better already.. =)
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Friday, June 06, 2008 @ 6/06/2008 08:43:00 PM
it so it begins
WOOOOOoooOOOOOoooOOOOO

its finally here

the long awaited weekend!!!!

and HOLS!!!

but then again..the hols...ill just be on a LESS tight schedule...still have FYP to do during the 2 weeks...not to mention aft the hols within a month it'll be CLINICALS 3B!!!! WTHHHHHHHH!!! 2 months!!! and i can forsee tt i will be CHALLENGED.....acute inpatient.....WOW...-___- just make sure tt my "best fren" isnt in charge of me...AHAHAH!!

and then just b4 clincials commence? its a whole week of exams....A WHOLE WEEK LEH!!! WHOA LAO EH.......no life man..

and well..like i was ranting to melia...

i've been appointed chairperson for the student conference

if you ask me...i really dunno what the big whoo-haa is...i mean from wad i know..its just like planning for any other event mah...like another vocational dialogue and another education advancement...esp since we're not graded on it this year ( right?)...the only thing tt makes it diff? is tt the chairperson has to give a speech.........like...ok..tt IS a little daunting but...oh well...i might be wrong in understanding the scope and extent of this event but yea...from wad ive observed the past 2 years..tts pretty much it...im not saying its easy-peasy but...yea...i dunno =S

but in any case....yea...lets just say tt i was minding my own business...keeping a low profile like i ALWAYS do in class...occasional participating in the sabo-ing but not to tt great an extent...and the only towards the tail-end tt when we had to vote for a chairperson and secretary tt they decided tt we shld have an equal number of ppl from each project group ( coz this conference is for us to present our research papers)...so my group ended up being the only group left with only 1 member already involved...and for SOME WEIRD REASON : i was suddenly from a minding-my-own business person to a and-now-lets-welcome-our-new-chairperson. i was like ?!?!?!?!?!!?

i was kinda worried and stressed aft all tt was settled...i mean...we'll be VERY busy in time to come with FYP, exams, clinicals, FYP,exmas, FYP, clinicals, FYP all wayyy...and then before you know it...its time to present your findings...like WTHHHH...and im not exactly your model student and all i mean....i think im ok but apparently some ppl dun think i have enough initiative for anything coz im too quiet -____- and i guess im afraid i can't cope.

*disclaimer though i think its unecesary but one can never be too careful-- the content below may come across as unreasonable but they are my thoughts and my thoughts alone..this being a blog, the nature of the information here will naturally be subjective so if you can 't stomach it..then thats just you not being able to cope with the realities of life and come back when you're ready to read what a blog could sound like*

i mean...yea...why bother about what they say right? i know...but i guess tt psychological thing at the back of your head is just so irritating telling you tt those ppl MIGHT be right aft all..knowing tt someone up there * to me its just a status thing..with status comes power amen* is kinda evaluating you and well...i mean....i dunno lah...they'll be biatching abt you behind your back..im not an idiot to believe tt ALL humans are tt perfect and nice...and being in healthcare does not automatically make tt go away...ppl like tt still exist..whether or not they are senior to you...

in fact sometimes i think ppl in healthcare are more conniving than you think they are....when you have to work with ppl day-in-day-out..you'll eventually pick up the skills needed for effective communication...which means evaluating ppl and situations..so yea...

ok..went off-track but yea....anyway...i was telling melia tt i dun lead well or rather...i wldnt call it leading but lets just say i dun have the drive and my "leader-like" qualities dun come out unless its sth tt im passionate about or driven about...so initially i wasnt driven at all..but aft analysing the situation.....ive got drive...im going to break free from the chainssssss * wilson philips...sing along if you know the song....or if its in your era -___-*

YEA MAN..and if my FYP members will notice how come nowadays im suddenly more INTO FYP? its coz ive somehow developed the challenge for myself...not so much with knowledge exploration as the motivation but rather...breaking free from the chaaaaiinnnsss as the motivation...

to crush all pre-concived notions based on groundless and highly subjective interpretations that were seemingly accurate validated only because of the hierarchical nature of the relationship and system that naturally leads to the assumption that the individual is somehow competent in all areas to judge characters.... ( this might not make sense but im nto really thinking either)

how do you fight things like tt?
if you cant beat them? join them.
i'll play by the book. i'll excel.

Meritocracy.

tts how it its...tts how ill fight...

i always believe respect has to be earned. its not sth tt comes along with a status and postion. the position and status somehow just works as a catalyst. it just draws ppl attention to you, speeds up the possible reaction. but then again..there has to be something to keep tt reaction going and well..if you dun have anything to react with anyting..tt catalyst is rendered useless. credentials alone dun cut it when you have to be a role model. its attitude. its YOU as a person. if you know you're not a good person for ppl to role-model aft, then dun make it an option even in the 1st place.

i dun even know why im getting so worked up over BLAH...but i guess its just a build-up. i had forgotten about it but tt mention of a shot 6 word sentence was ENOUGH to set me off...and well..subsequent events just PEEEESSED me off....TZAH!!

FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT!!!

and we're gonna do it on OUR own =)

- it feels good writing like tt aft so long...been so long since i gave myslef pep-talk like tt to rally the inner army within..AHAH!!-
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Wednesday, June 04, 2008 @ 6/04/2008 12:44:00 AM
short update
well..

i know its been eons since the last ranting session...i promise a long post the next time i blog..its a busy week this week...so...well..will be online late and well..not much time or energy to go into reflection state of mind...

so...erm...just a note to say "I'M NOT DEAD!" * you better damn well not be -melia* AHAHAH!! and keep your eyes peeled on facebook and acareak blog...AHAHAHAH!!

i dunno why im making it sound so exciting when its actually just...well..sth so normal but at the same time so new to us..AHAHAH!! ill be looking forward to it...hols are next week...altho theres still work to be done if not more than now....at least some days off are better than nothing...ahaha!! well..the weeks to come AFTER the hols are NOTHING to be happy about but yea...its gonna come so lets just enjoy wads gonna happen in the near-er future...AHAHAH!!

OK! im off! updates soon! i promise =)
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